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320. Alchemy

Teaser: In which the Captain asserts that theology isn't a real science like alchemy, which as examples go works about as well as alchemy.

CHURCH INTERIOR Priest, Captain, Ranger

[FRAME 1]

Priest: After generations of selective breeding, men have been able to breed faster horses. The gods created horses with wings!

Captain: But that's not science! Science is dropping things off a tower, or finding the method to turn lead into gold. Praying is just asking for a favour.

[FRAME 2]

Priest: Irrelevant! Science is about finding a method to reliably produce a desired result. What does it matter whether that method is mixing a bunch of powders or "asking for a favour"?

Captain: It matters because you aren't the one doing it!

[FRAME 3]

Ranger: Hold up. Couldn't you just, kinda, ask for a favour?

Priest: What?

Ranger: If you really do practice science, then why can't you use your science to measure how happy people are?

[FRAME 4]

Priest: It's not as simple--

Ranger: Why not? Asking the gods seems a lot simpler than trying to create some mystical device that tells you how much people weigh.